Drained
“He is a shoe that walks away: “I will not go where you want to go.” “Why, then, are you a shoe? “I’m not. I have the sole of a lover but don’t know what love is.” “Discover it, then.” “Will I have to go where you go?”– I read this from a friend’s blog. It’s a line from a poem; it caught my breath for a few seconds, sad, sad voice…
I sat on my chair tired from my days offering, I just wrapped up my shoot, women, a lot of them today, different shades, different modes, chosen from a list of substantial candidates, well so they say… god they are all tiring… a deep sigh exhausted from my mouth… another resignation… I came home with a bag of new toys for my Friday shoot, as I dumped it on my floor I looked around and saw all the other new toys that I piled up, my empty canvas still waiting for life…
I washed up trying to renew my senses but I’m still tired… I thought of all the things that could make an artist full of excitement and I think I have some on the tip of my fingers, dangling them for a while so I could get back my energy… I stared on the water going down the drain… ‘That’s me a little drained’… just for the day… I know I asked for it and I’m very thankful… one by one, I will fill everything up and finish… but now, oh I think I will have to rest for a while so I could still have air for the coming days…
“Damn, I need a date for Belo’s anniv…’ my photographer friend blurted out frustrated on his phone, he wanted me to join him but my plate is so full I don’t want to end up not showing up… I stared at him, what a lovely dilemma, anyone would love to go with him to see Dita Von Teese in flesh, ‘Oh honey, I know, you could get any date you want, but it’s a matter of do you want to just ask anybody.’ I gave a deep sigh. Yes, dates… with the activities we have in this industry it’s easy to get a date, things could get really exciting but sometimes you only have a few you want to share it with cuz the others you bring along puts it to waste or puts you to waste…
I am pooped and tired… sleep is calling me anytime now but I’m still here wasting time… I could feel a hand grasping my neck, it’s soothing…’could you let it stay, longer, this neck is weary and tired please do not break it, it needs a resting ground…’
